Words.  We need them, but we tend to give them different values depending on who uses them or how they are used.  For example, Kobe Bryant gets in trouble for calling a referee a faggot, or Lady Gaga refers to people as retards and a firestorm erupts. 

           Yet motherfucker, cocksucker, and asshole all seem to be acceptable terms to insult or berate people.  However how many mothers are here tonight?  Gentlemen, if you were to fuck one of these mothers you would be a motherfucker.  Therefore the term is no longer derogatory, but just a descriptive word.

          “That Tommy is a real motherfucker.”

           “I know and he’s a Mormon.”

           Think about it.  If a female gives birth she is a mother, making anyone who fucks her, a motherfucker.  All these guys banging MILFs? Motherfuckers.  Gentlemen we need to rise up and stop this hurtful language.  Remember that motherfucker is a term of accomplishment. 

            Ladies, I won’t ask, but I know some of you suck cock.  This is not a bad thing, however, I can understand you reluctance to admit that you do.  Aren’t you offended when someone refers to another person as a cocksucker?  The truth is that guys wish there were more cocksuckers around, so it seems rather reDICKulous  to bad mouth an act that most, if not all, guys would love to have performed on them daily, if not hourly.

            If guys could suck their own cocks they would, and relationships between men and women might improve. I would argue that straight guys would consider sucking each other’s cocks if they weren’t perceived as gay.  Gay guys don’t bother me at all.  Whatever floats your boat, floats your boat, just keep it private.  However, if you are lesbians, film it and send it to me in an email.  Basically all I’m trying to say is that the use of the word cocksucker only shows a deep seeded need in the user that reflects upon him, more than the person the word is directed at.

           Finally, asshole, no offense intended.  Ladies and gentlemen, we all have one.  So when you call someone an asshole, you are actually referring to yourself.  It would seem, depending upon your own self-esteem, when you use the word if it is a compliment or insult.  I have good self-esteem, so if I call you an asshole, it is a compliment.  Now you may have low self-esteem and consider it an insult or use the term towards other as an insult.  However that is your own perception and it is you attaching meaning to a harmless word.

          We need to take these words and accept them for what they are, just words.  So the next time someone calls you a motherfucker, cocksucker or asshole, consider them compliments, I do, and trust me I get called them quite a bit.